It’s not impermanence that makes us suffer.
What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not.
_Thich Nhat Hanh
|How I wish this vibrant bloom would defy the impermanent nature of life!|
It has been some time now since I have been on a learning spree, if I can call it that – spree, I mean. It really wasn’t what I wanted to do, but life seems to have had some plans up its sleeve, and it sprung those upon me when I wasn’t really looking forward to any major changes.
I lost the apple of my eyes – my pet, Chikoo. Not that I hadn’t known all along that some day he would part ways with us. We all do. As if we have a say in matters of the universe! So, as much as I have accepted that this is the nature of life – temporary – I am finding it difficult to deal with my loss.
Dealing with loss isn’t easy; how well we all know that! And, yet, we keep on moving ahead in life, wishing life was easier to deal with, loss was easier to deal with. Sadly, though, we really have no choice but accept whatever fate has in store for us. We lose people to death or to circumstances; at times, people simply drift away, like the ship that drifts away by the current of the sea waters leaving behind many a teary eyed souls waving their goodbyes to their ‘someones’ who may never ever return. Despite making promises of staying by each other’s sides forever and ever people move away, reinforcing the temporariness of everything in life.
Haven’t we known all along that nothing lasts forever, not even feelings, then why do we find it so painful to accept this bitter fact of life? There are some brave hearts out there, who accept it all with a smile – the changes that occur, the losses they suffer – all of it. I like to think that either they are superlatively courageous, or exceedingly stoic. I am not so sure if there are any degrees of stoicism, though, but this is what I feel about people who take it all on their chin.
And, here I am, unable to digest even the loss of friends who decided to go their separate ways without so much as a goodbye! As much as I am aware of this temporariness, I am still to come to terms with the fact that there are people in my life who might just walk away from me some day; without caring to give me an explanation, or even bid me farewell! I am still to accept the fact that the life I live today might take a 360 degree turn and change like I have never ever imagined. And, that is what frightens me. It just scares the hell out of me! It’s really not the kind of language I use on my blog, but these words perfectly sum up my feelings!
This constant urge to change is the one characteristic feature of life that overwhelms me. How I wish things were a bit different, with only the unpleasantness undergoing the necessary change and the happiness staying intact…untouched! Life would be so happy happy…no? Now, I know what you will say: “if we don’t learn about sorrow, how will we value the happiness we are blessed with?” etc etc. But, I say, what’s the harm in fantasising? We have to get back to facing life in a moment or two, so until then, why not just go sailing on the ship of our dreams and wish life stayed a bed of roses?
I would have then had my Chikoo with me, always, always!
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