Last week, I celebrated my 45th birthday. It feels strange–this realisation that I completed 45 years, considering I don’t feel 45. In a few years’ time (if I happen to stick around that long) I will be 50! Find that hard to believe, too.
However, it does feel wonderful being 45, thanks to the maturity and the wisdom that come along with it! Going through the highs and lows of Life, learning from every pain, every wound through the years transforms us. It adds to our personality. A dear friend stated that she “Enjoys adding years!”
Well, so do I!
I thought of doing a post titled, ’45 things I learned at 45′, or something of the sort, but listing 45 things felt tedious. And, it would have made too long a list for anyone to read! So, I am just jotting down stuff that has started making sense to me; stuff that made me aware about Life and Her weird ways; stuff I need to learn about and inculcate in myself in order to stay sane through it all. No apologies for overusing the word, ‘stuff’.
1. That’s number one on my to-do list– BEING UNAPOLOGETIC. I realised that living the past so many years wondering if I was hurting sentiments, or living as per others’ expectations had gotten me nowhere, so it’s high time I changed! I need to speak what comes to my mind, irrespective of what others think. Not that I intend to hurt others’ feelings, but then, things staying bottled up hurts me more!
2. Shit happens. When you least expect it. And, the shitty phase can last for quite a while.
But, it all ends some day, for nothing is permanent. So, all you can–and should–do, is go with the flow, and never, ever, ask “WHY ME?” We never ask, “Why am I so happy?”, do we? Cliche, I know, but true!
3. Treasure people. Your tribe–the ones who rally around in your time of crisis, the ones who know something’s wrong just by looking into your eyes or from the tone of your voice and pull you out of the abyss you find yourself in–treasure them. They are your guardian angels. And, they are who make your Life beautiful.
And, please, please, share your troubles, your anxieties, your fears with them. Or, listen to what they have to say when they are in need. You never know what a patient ear and a shoulder to lean on can do. Well, it sure can save a Life!
4. Stop taking yourself for granted. YOU MATTER. Period. And, have faith in yourself. Remember that line from Tumhari Sulu– “Main kar sakti hai.”? You, too, can do it. Yes, you can!
5. Learn to be comfortable in your own skin. Everyone’s ageing, honey. That’s Life! The fine lines that increase by the day, the silver in the hair, the aches in the joints, the mood swings. All of it. This is the stuff that makes you human!
6..Remember one thing, and remember it always: You are beautiful inside out. For it’s what’s within that matters more and reflects on your face. Be proud of the fact that the face that peeps at you from the mirror is 100% genuine, not one that’s been “worked upon”, you get me? And, smile. It adds to your face value. Another cliche, eh?
7. It takes around 21 days to form a habit. Kick a bad one and find a new one to develop that will enrich your Life in some way.
8. Get off your butt, walk around. DO NOT sit for long. Take a short ‘walking’ break every 45 minutes.
9. Put the darn phone away. Spend lesser time on social media (read, virtual world), and more time in the real world to find true peace of mind. Unless you are a blogger, of course!
10. Learn to enjoy your own company. As stifling as that may seem, at times, it’s better than depending upon others for your happiness.
That’s all for now. These are just some of the things I keep reminding myself to practice every day, to the best of my ability. I do forget stuff, but then, it comes with the ‘territory’ – I am perimenopausal!
If you’d you like to add to this list, go right ahead!