Women’s Day.

         Tomorrow the world will be celebrating International Women’s Day.  It will  be something important for many women who will be raising a toast to themselves and their like, revelling in some attention heaped upon them by the society or even their families ( their better halves ). But, for many more women, it will be just another day, which will begin and end with them toiling for their families and a complete neglect for themselves. I know, I sound cynical and least enthusiastic about such a big day in the lives of half of the world’s population. But, is it really that important a day in our lives? I don’t think so.
There will be articles written about how women need to come into their own, raise their voice against atrocities and work towards being on par with men. How, the society needs to wake up to the problems faced by women and strive to make the world a safer place for them. So, I won’t be talking anything on these topics here. I would just  like to share my feelings about Women’s Day from a house wife’s , oh…sorry! home maker’s point of view. What it is that I would like to see happening in my (as well as many others like me) life.
Some time back, I read an article about how a husband asked his wife ( a home maker ) what she did the whole day. Tired of his incessant taunts, the smart woman decided to show him exactly what it was that she did. She did nothing! The kids went hungry,the dog had soiled the carpet, the house was in a shambles…in short, there was utter chaos that welcomed the man that evening! I think, this applies to almost all the households that I know. So, dear husbands, I would like to inform you all that we may not be working in some corporate firms, earning lakhs, but, we take care of our homes, kids and parents in your absence (kindly note that it is not ‘your parents’/’your kids’). You may be very well aware of it, but, you need to show some appreciation for all that we do for you and our families.
We women weren’t born with the task of being the only ones to be polite and respectful while conversing  or dealing with you and everyone else in the family. So, kindly make it a point to speak politely to us ( when not arguing/fighting over trivial issues). That would definitely have a good impact on the children who seem to be really observant!  We don’t need any surprise gifts ( which is a waste of money) or flowers ( which ultimately wilt and die). All we really need is to be shown some consideration when things do not happen according to your expectations. We are humans too. Likewise, kindly do not brush aside the suggestions we make, We too possess a mind that has the ability to think rationally and logically.
And, lastly, along with all of the above, please give us your most precious gift…your time. The fast lives that we lead make time fly in the blink of an eye. Your work and your social lives leave no time for us because of which we feel the gap between two souls increasing by the day. Thats all that I have to ask for. I don’t think it is an impossible job for go-getters like you! And this was not a taunt…! You all ARE go-getters, aren’t you?
The day my above wishes get fulfilled will be the day I celebrate Women’s Day. Till then, I will wait …and watch…with all the patience I have been blessed with!
Thank you!

The above blog was not meant to sound sarcastic….but, if it did, then kindly re-read it…..the tone used was calm, polite and respectful!

Father of the bride


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       Some days ago, I saw this movie on TV-  Father of the bride. I have seen it around 10 times already, but I can still watch it…again and again. Although it is a comedy, there is some thing about the story that tugs at the heartstrings. And by the end of it I have a lump in my throat.  All the emotions demonstrated by the actor Steve Martin’s character, when he comes to know that his daughter – his little girl – is now a grown up woman who has decided to get married,  are the most natural ones that any father would go through under similar circumstances.  Doubt and suspicion about the boy chosen by his daughter, the inability to accept that his princess, his little girl, is not little anymore and is now on the threshold of a new milestone in her life, the apprehensions  about his daughter’s future with another man are all that every father goes through. What is it about daughters that makes the strongest, bravest of fathers go all mushy when their little girls are ready to leave the nest? I will never know…..I can never be a father (!) and I don’t have a daughter- my bad luck!
    Daddies dote on their little girls….girls, who will always remain ‘little’ for their dads, no matter how much they age! I am sure, so many of them feel that even when the girl is of marriageable age, she is ‘still so small’! Why the hurry? is the question often asked! And no boy is suitable enough, however much educated or well brought up he may be. He is never the ‘best’ for their girls.
   I think, if they could, fathers would as well get home the son-in-law rather than send the apple of their eyes away from them!  And the way some of them study the ‘boys’ – under a microscope! The boys are always on edge, always nervous about being observed for every mannerism, from every angle.  Impressing a future father in law is akin to giving the toughest examination of their lives – something that I saw in another movie, Meet the parents. But, then, those very boys need to know that they would be doing the exact same thing when their daughters would decide to tie the knot!
   My dad, like all the other dads of the world, brought me up like a princess, gave me the very best of everything I wanted. And, one fine day, he would be left without me, is an idea that must have given him sleepless nights. It’s only now that I can comprehend what he must have gone through while giving my hand  away in marriage. His tears spoke a thousand words! And even today, I remain his little girl who needs his guidance and protection in this ugly world! Now, I am getting all mushy!
  Ah, well, life as we know, is uncertain, but, one thing that we girls know for certain is that wherever we may be, whatever we may do, we will always be present in our dad’s prayers. And if, God forbid, some untoward situations do arise, then the person who will be the first one to come to our rescue will be daddy dearest! Don’t you agree, girls?!

Men will be men, will be men!!

  Men……! What was God thinking when he got down to creating them, I will always wonder! And after trying to change them in all these years, we women have not been successful…..at all! Not that I have anything against them as such…I mean, we would never be able to survive without them. But, there are certain habits or idiosyncrasies  of these creatures that do get to me…to all of us women, I am sure. There is so much to write about them ; I have written in an earlier blog- a letter to God on what changes we would appreciate in the future production of this species; but, it isn’t much. Thats because we keep spotting something or other about them that needs to be talked about. Pent up emotions create a havoc on my system and thus, this blog , which I am writing on behalf of my ‘sisters’, many of who will agree with me.
   We all may have observed it…there is this very irritating habit of men that needs to be done to death. And that is…..even when they are out with their wives/girlfriends, they busy themselves with admiring other women/girls instead of admiring their own! I mean, come on, guys….you have your partners WITH you, look at THEM! Admire them, appreciate them for what they are, at least when they are with you. When you are by yourselves, you may look anywhere you wish to, admire God’s art work to your heart’s content, but, definitely NOT when we are with you! Yes, we may be ugly ducklings in your eyes, but, hello!….we chose you, too! Remember? We may have been married to you /with you for many years, and thus, ‘old and boring’, but duh….DITTO!! We still have eyes only for you….well, at least when we are with you!! Hehehe…
     Come on, guys, bring a change in yourselves….for old times’ sakes. See, as of now and here, THIS is  the only point I am going to touch upon. So, at least pretend to learn a thing or two. When you are with your girls, LOOK/ADMIRE THEM, GIVE THEM YOUR UNDIVIDED ATTENTION….not other girls…in short, don’t be those silly table fans, be the air-conditioners that are focused on one point! Okay? I mean, look, frankly, we too have a lot to look at when we are outdoors…..God has created such beautiful specimens that actually, at times, we really don’t know whom to gawk at!!! But, we don’t do that..when we are with you, do we? That would drive you up the wall, won’t it? So, lets make it a give and take thing…you admire us and we do the same…or else, we embarrass you, what say you??

Sexy Chefs!

      The title of this blog is surely going to seem uncomfortable to some, but, you will also agree that there is definitely something sexy about men in the kitchen, or should I say, male chefs! Everytime you switch on some cookery channel, you will find men in their crisp white uniforms, with the chef’s hat ( or is it cap?) swinging around in the kitchen, preparing some or other mouth-watering recipe. There are women chefs,  too, but, men make it far more interesting, except for Nigella Lawson! Be it Gordon Ramsay (agreed, the guy is somewhat  crazy, but he is surely a sight to see!), or be it our very own Sanjeev Kapoor, men do make better chefs than women…..definitely more entertaining! Whoever said that cooking is a woman’s job, or that a kitchen is a female domain, is surely going to curse me and call me  names, but, this is what I feel.
    I do have proof of what I am talking! My husband of 16 years is a man passionate about food. Yes, his physique will vouch for it!  I remember, when we were to get married, he assured my parents that they need not worry about their daughter as he could cook everything, except chapatis so, I would never go hungry!! 🙂 But, it was only when I saw him in action- in the kitchen, that my heart skipped a beat! Sundays would be my favourite days as I didn’t have to bother about what to prepare for breakfast ,lunch or dinner……I got whatever I asked for, prepared with much love and presented in a very professional manner. I used to get a feeling that Sundays were spent in restaurants!  He would cook anything that we asked of him. It was such a relief! It really felt like Sunday! Now that he is a busy guy with a hectic social life, I really miss those Sundays.
       For your information, hubby can cook anything, from mutton biryani to veg dishes and everything in between… you name it.. In fact, 90% of what I know today, i learnt from him! I really wasn’t all that keen on learning what my mum tried teaching me before marriage. But, thankfully for my husband,  I just had to scream from the kitchen when some thing went wrong. In would breeze my knight in shining armour to save my honour! He is such a sight to see when in the kitchen. Be it chopping, sautéing, roasting or frying….the love that he puts in it all is to be seen to be enjoyed. And at such times, I stay out of the kitchen. I only enter once he has had his party (read, once he has finished cooking). Then I have mine…well, the kitchen needs to be cleaned up!!
      A friend of mine is equally passionate about cooking. When I ask him what he had for dinner, he not only tells me what he ate, but also tells me how he prepared it. It feels like I have been handed  a menu card of some high-end restaurant! I can only imagine what a sight he must be, zipping about in his kitchen, deftly handling the cooking equipments and dishing out yummy cuisine for his family!  The passion with which these guys  not only cook, but also explain the entire procedure, speaks volumes about how much they love the act of cooking. And, I think, this passion for food and their culinary skills, is what makes them confident enough to handle all those tools as well as themselves in a female-dominated area and that is exactly what makes such men look SEXY in the kitchen!..(.as opposed to those clumsy fellows who would be all lost if asked to spend a minute in there!). They all look super cute,  indulging their fantasies of being some big shot, super chefs, dishing out exotic stuff for hungry souls! I am sure wives of such men will agree that it is akin to watching a live cookery show!
   Ahh!! It’s been quite a while since I watched a cookery show myself! I think tonight I will plead with hubby darling to revive old memories on one of these days. It will give me a chance to just put up my feet and feast my eyes on my super, sexy chef in action!


    In India, there are just two things that have a tremendous impact on people’s minds – cricket and films. Every time there is a match, we see hordes of Kohlis and Tendulkars, in every nook and corner, in every gully, showing off their batting skills, totally over come by the spirit of the game. The same applies to our films. Every time there is a new release, we only hear songs from that film, fashion trends  of the heroines followed and dialogues being spewed and dance moves being copied left, right and centre.
   Some days ago, my 4 and a half year old nephew had come over to our place for a week as his baby-sitter was out of town. With his mum busy at office, the responsibility of keeping the tot busy through the day was on my shoulders. The day had to start with his favourite cartoon serials and end with a walk outdoors with my pet dog. And during the walk, the most viewed  object and discussed topic would be the Dhoom bikes!
    The moment we would step out of our building compound, our little hero would busy himself spotting the said bike and then plead, ” WIll you get me such a bike when I grow up?”  And, I would say sure, but first you need to grow up, as tall and strong as your dad and uncle only then will we think about the bike. And that would start the chain of our conversations. It would transport him to a dream-land where he would grow up and his dad would get him his favourite bike….sleek and black. And then, he would go vroom!!!
     “When I get the bike, I am going to drive it at full speed….like this”, and he would run at full speed, his hands in the handle- holding position. Once, I told him, that we  must never drive at such a speed as that could lead to problems with the law….in kid-lingo, the police would catch hold of him for speeding . For which he replied,”but, Aamir Khan drives the bike at full speed in the film!” I reasoned,”Aamir Khan is a thief in the movie and he happens to be chased by the police and that is why he drives his bike so fast.” Pat came the reply,”Okay, then, I too will become a thief when I grow up and then I too will drive my bike at great speed! YES, I will become a THIEF!! Yayyy!!” Much to my embarrassment as well as amusement, our little guy ran in circles announcing to the world and to himself that he would grow up to be a thief just like Aamir Khan and go vroom!
     I really didn’t know where to look and how to stop our  hero in his tracks. Later on, when I narrated the story to his mum, we had a hearty laugh and beamed with love and admiration at his imagination and his innocence and most of all, at his keen observation! We weren’t really worried about our little guy fulfilling his dreams of becoming an out law, but we were amazed at the impact the film had had on such a young mind! The guy, at his age, knows the names of all the famous stars, knows the songs and the dialogues, although he doesn’t know what the hell they mean!  He knows exactly when, in a particular song, the hero kisses  the heroine or makes a romantic move! And this, when he is busy with his school and studies the entire day and watches the idiot-box for just an hour or so in the evenings! And if at his age he is so much affected by films, what is going to happen when he is in his teens?!
    Only time can tell if our little hero outgrows all this humbug or gets pulled into the whirlwind of our hindi movies. But, one thing is for sure, the dream of his Dhoom bike will stay for some more time, till another film makes it to the box-office and brings out with it a new and better attraction to lure young minds.
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