S – Be your own Support System. #AtoZChallenge

S – Be your own Support System. #AtoZChallenge

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It’s contradictory to what I shared about connecting with your tribe, isn’t it?

“Be your own support system.”

Apologies, if you think I mislead you.

You should definitely have a support system–your close friends and family who will be by your side through thick and thin, but, you also need to learn to be self-reliant.

Life is such…

Each one of us here is fighting a battle. With Life, you never know when it will spring a surprise (or a shock) on you. So, it could happen thus, that, precisely when you are experiencing a tough situation, the people in your tribe might also be going through a difficult period.

Just when you need someone by your side, you might not have anyone; or, those around might be preoccupied with their own worries. What do you do then? You don’t wish to burden them with your troubles, do you?

Of course, there are others around who will come to your aid. But, it’s something I have learned over the years that…

YOU ARE, BASICALLY, ON YOUR OWN.

The reason being, no one can fight your battles for you. You need to do it yourself. You might get support, but, once you enter the arena, it’s just you who’s facing the bull. And, so that you are able enough to face the raging bull and save yourself, you need to become YOUR OWN SUPPORT SYSTEM.

It’s tough, I know, but if we accept the (bitter) truth, it will be easier preparing ourselves to face the upheavals we come across, isn’t it? Of course, as much as we prepare ourselves, we can never be sure of what Life brings along with it!

However, if we accept that Life is capable of capsizing our boat when we least expect it, and hence arm ourselves with enough courage and will-power to face any situation, we will be able to get through it. Bruised and battered, but we will make our way through it, for sure.

Once we instil it in our mind, it gets easier working on our strength, looking for alternatives, and making ourselves mentally fitter to face all that Life brings along.

TIPS TO BECOME STRONGER AND SELF-RELIANT:

Begin your day with positive affirmations:

I am ready to face whatever comes my way.

I am enough.

I am physically, mentally and emotionally, stronger than I know.

I am my HERO.

I am confident of myself.

Life is good, despite its ups and downs. I love the ‘ups’ and learn from the ‘downs’.

I am not perfect, but it’s okay. I am ME…I am UNIQUE.

Control your mind:

Practise mindfulness. It’s difficult, but it’s worth it.

Live in the moment.

Do not frighten yourself with dark imaginings. Our anxieties stem only from imagining the worst-case-scenario.

Breathe.

Avoid multi-tasking and stay sane.

Look after your health and your needs.

Make self-care an important part of your day.

Smile.

Trust in the Super Power/God/Almighty. He gives us only those problems that we can handle, to make us stronger than we are.

Lift your morale with positive self-talk….each day, every day.

And, if Plan A doesn’t work, there are 26 letters in the alphabet.

Finally, always remember, you are much more capable than you give yourself credit for.

Wish you the best, my darlings!

Love,

SHILPA…

I am participating in the April A to Z Blogging Challenge, and my theme is, ‘SELF-CARE’. You will find my posts here.

R – Relax and Rejuvenate. #AtoZChallenge

R – Relax and Rejuvenate. #AtoZChallenge

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We will be more successful in all our endeavours if we can let go of the habit of running all the time, and take little pauses to relax and re-centre ourselves. And, we will also have a lot more joy in living!”

–Thich Nhat Hanh

 

So, how often do you take a break? Or, are you a workaholic, who thinks sleep is a waste of time and relaxing, laziness?

It’s necessary that we take a break once a week. Well, God, too, took rest on the seventh day, didn’t He?

However much enthusiasm we might hold within ourselves, it’s a fact that our body is not a machine that can work, ceaselessly. A machine, too, breaks down if overworked, and so could our body. And, our  mind, too!

Remember what we learned in school?

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”

It also makes Jill a dull girl! Jill, as in, YOU, my dear reader!

It’s OKAY to relax once a week; laze around doing nothing, or doing something you don’t do during the week days. That doesn’t mean you spend the day doing laundry, or cleaning up the entire house!

Just sit, breathe easy, sip your tea/coffee nice and slow and bask in the moment.

TIPS TO RELAX AND REJUVENATE YOUR BODY:

  1. Sleep until late on a Sunday. Your body isn’t accustomed to it, I know, so sleep till as long as you feel like, so that you wake up fresh.
  2. Stretch your body and exercise a little. I have noticed that if I miss my Yoga even for a day, my body feels ‘rusty’!
  3. Opt for something different for breakfast and try to involve the kids in making it.
  4. Put your phones away and spend time with your kids or friends and family.
  5. Unplug. The world won’t change much in a day if you don’t check what’s going on out there.
  6. Pamper yourself–either at home, or at the salon–and feel rejuvenated!

 

TIPS TO RELAX YOUR MIND:

  1. Play some music and sing along.
  2. De-clutter just one area of one room on a Sunday, and make plans to tackle another area the next Sunday. In short, just clean-up one spot instead of scrubbing the entire house; you will be bone-tired by the end of the day.
  3. De-clutter your mental rooms, too. Talk things out with your close ones if something’s been bothering you during the week and try to sort it out, or dump it in the trash can if it’s irreparable. Just let things be!
  4. Catch up on a movie or two at home with the entire family. For hubby and me, Sundays are ‘Movie days’, when we surf through Netflix and watch a couple of films.
  5. Prepare a to-do list for the next week/plan your meals/sort your work clothes. Be ready for the week ahead.

 

This is usually what I do on a Sunday, and believe me, it feels fantastic! Make changes as per your lifestyle, but do take that break.

YOU need it, my dear!

 

Love,

SHILPA…

 

Our body is not a machine that can work ceaselessly. It needs weekly rest and relaxation.

I am participating in the April A to Z Blogging Challenge and my theme is, ‘SELF-CARE’. You will find all the A to Z posts here.

 

 

Q – Quit Multi-tasking. #AtoZChallenge

Q – Quit Multi-tasking. #AtoZChallenge

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Women are multi-taskers who juggle a hundred things as deftly as a juggler!

How proud I felt reading this statement! I would pat my back for accomplishing 5 tasks simultaneously. But, not once did I think about the frustration and irritation that would overcome me as I managed those 5 tasks. What an idiot I was!

I am sure all of us are guilty of multi-tasking, and feeling good about it, too. Rarely do we ponder how we harass our brain as we try to do so.

Have you observed how exasperated you are when there are 10 things demanding your attention and when you try to give all those 10 things your time?

Imagine yourself in the kitchen/work table, working on something, when your kid or someone asks for some help. Wanting to fulfil your their wish and completing the job at hand, you do both these things, simultaneously. And, just then, something else comes up.

Even as you try to do these three things together, your breathing becomes shallow, your heart-rate increases, you lose your attention and you feel your frustration rising by the minute. So, at the end of it all, what have you achieved that’s worth patting your back?

You managed to complete your work, fulfil people’s wish and some more work, but ended up tiring yourself–body and mind. Especially, mind.

According to research…

1. Our brain works efficiently while doing one task at a time.

2. We are most productive as we focus only on that one task.

3. We complete the task quicker and to our satisfaction.

4. And, doing that one task takes far less time than doing ten things to save time.

 

Multi-tasking affects your mind and your mood!

 

 

Multi-tasking not only affects your productivity and efficiency, it also affects your mood. How crabby we are when we juggle multiple tasks at a time!

So, irritation, frustration, inefficiency, lack of productivity, lousy moods, and exhaustion–this is what you get when you multi-task.

Why would you want to suffer from all of these, anyway? You won’t be receiving any medals for being so “competent”, will you?

 

Instead,

Be mindful of what you do when you do it.

Focus on the task at hand and immerse yourself completely in it.

This way, you will not only give it your 100%, but enjoy it, too.

Mindfulness improves your concentration, productivity and efficiency and reduces mental and physical fatigue.

 

Quit multitasking for your peace of mind!

Self-care means taking care of yourself and your mental and physical well-being, and when you multi-task, you are doing the exact opposite.

Do as much as you can, without burdening your brain or body.

Accomplish one task at a time. The world will not come to an end if you don’t complete all the tasks on your to-do list.

Begin with the important task. Then, move to the less important ones. And, if something gets left out, do not blame yourself for being slothful or incompetent. Just do it at the end, or the next day.

Be mindful of what you do and enjoy your work. This way, you will be satisfied with your efficiency and happy with yourself.

 

Love,

SHILPA…

 

Why you need to quit multi-tasking.

 

I am participating in the April A to Z Blogging Challenge and my theme this year is ‘SELF-CARE’.

You will find my posts here.

 

P – Pray, be grateful! #AtoZChallenge

P – Pray, be grateful! #AtoZChallenge

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Gratitude is one of the best ways to bring happiness into our life. By merely thanking the Universe for everything it has blessed us with, makes us feel so fortunate for living the life we do! All you need to do, is look around you and you will know how truly blessed you are.

Last evening, as I strolled at a park with my closest friend, as we discussed Life, we realised how much difference it made having all that we had with us.

Our parents, our closest friends, our health, our work, the ability to fulfil our dreams….and also, the things that went wrong and how these taught us so much about life and how it changed us into better versions of ourselves…

…we felt we were the luckiest people–God’s chosen ones!

The peace and happiness that we experienced left us overwhelmed.

Since some time now, I have given thanks to my Creator for all the problems I have had to face–the worst of the worse situations I went through…all of it. It’s because of those problems that I learned a lot and changed myself, for the better.

For all the difficulties we have experienced in Life, we need to be grateful. It’s thanks to those difficulties that we could unravel the true meaning of Life, that we feel truly close to God.

It’s thanks to those difficulties that we could discover our hidden strength, meet the people who truly care about us, and gain an understanding about things for the way they are.

 

PRACTISING GRATITUDE WITH A DIFFERENCE:

Every night,  think of 3 things that did not work out as you planned, or things that stressed you.

Next, jot down what you learned from your experience. You could even just reflect on it, there’s no need to write it all. Just 15 minutes of reflection on the day gone by would suffice.

And, finally, be grateful for those problems, those stresses. It will seem difficult being thankful for the tension in your world, but trust me, when you think hard about it, you will notice how blessed you truly are!

THIS is what I mean by practising gratitude with a difference.

It’s the adversities that we, actually, need to be grateful for; we are forever grateful for all that gives us joy, but rarely for the times that test our patience and resilience.

Gratitude is definitely one of the most important ways to self-care. It’s because of all that we experience  that we learn to fight, take care of ourselves and focus on what truly matters, on the bigger picture. Do you know  how good this is for your mental health?

 

Points to ponder:

“PROBLEMS ARE LIKE WASHING MACHINES. THEY TWIST US, SPIN US AND KNOCK US AROUND. BUT, IN THE END, WE COME OUT CLEANER, BRIGHTER AND BETTER THAN BEFORE!”

 

So, be grateful for it all!

 

Love,

SHILPA…

 

Be grateful for all that goes right and also for all that goes wrong in your Life.

 

I am participating in the April A to Z Blogging Challenge. My theme this year is, ‘SELF-CARE’. You will find all the posts here.

 

O – Observe your thoughts. #AtoZChallenge

O – Observe your thoughts. #AtoZChallenge

#AtoZChallenge 2019 Tenth Anniversary badge

One of the most important things my doctor told me during a counselling session, was to “observe my thoughts”.  

As someone suffering from anxiety for so many years now, I realised how I would be filled with self-doubt, with words that wrecked my self-esteem and drove away any peace I enjoyed.

Words like, “You are an utter failure,” or, “You are so worthless, what have you done with your life?” haunted me so often. I began to doubt my capabilities. There was also the comparison with others that was going on in my mind, and when I would watch others “getting ahead”, it would only make me more conscious about what a loser I was. “What had I achieved in my life?” 

Don’t we all do that? Telling ourselves that we are no good, that we might never make it in “the race” where others are way ahead and we haven’t even begun? Telling ourselves how we can’t even manage the simplest of tasks by ourselves?

It’s these words full of negativity and slander, that we so need to keep out of our mind. Our mind can, and will, help us, provided we learn to control it. And, observing our thoughts is the first step to controlling our mind and lifting our morale.

Our thoughts become our beliefs and our beliefs show in our actions. 

The way we think about ourselves and our life takes no time to manifest in our actions.

In short, our thoughts become our reality.

Failure is a word we fear. And, the biggest mistake we commit is when we compare ourselves with others. Rarely do we understand that no two people live a similar life; that none of us here is in any race, and that not a single soul is so blessed as to have a “perfect” life.

So, if you find yourself on the receiving end of these barbs through your ‘self-talk’, just order yourself to shut up.

 

CHANGE YOUR THOUGHT PATTERN WITH POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS:

Look yourself in the mirror, look yourself in the eye, and tell yourself, that,

  1. You are NOT a failure
  2. You are perfect in spite of your imperfections.
  3. You are enough.
  4. You are in no race, whatsoever, and you compete only with yourself.
  5. You can, and will, succeed in whatever you set your mind on.
  6. And,  you are worthy of love and respect.

Observe yourself when any negative thoughts crowd your mind. Observe your breath and you will find your breathing shallow; a sense of unease swallowing you up and a discomfort in your heart.

Our thoughts have that power over us.  They can completely destroy our inner peace, our sense of self-worth and any amount of happiness we experience in Life.

Learn to control your mind by being mindful, every moment.

Practice gratitude, every moment of every day, for every little thing–good or bad–that happens in your Life. You may not know, but there’s so much to your life that makes it beautiful!

Feed your mind good thoughts about yourself and your Life, and then see the difference it makes to your world!

 

Love,

SHILPA…

Your thoughts become your beliefs