Fight for your life!

My dear friend,

This letter may come as a surprise to you. I hope you read it as soon as you receive it. Read it before it gets deleted/read by someone who has no right, whatsoever, to read your private mail.

I know my words might come as a shock to you, but, it’s a known secret that things aren’t as hunky dory in your life as you try to portray to the world.  Your  nervous demeanour never gets missed by me, or by the people of our apartment building. The way you resist mingling with us, or, sugarcoat your talks about your life when you do,  speaks a lot about the reality that you try to conceal from the world!

The walls aren’t soundproof, my dear, because I often hear you sobbing, whimpering, putting up with all the physical abuse you are being subjected to. I also have a fair idea that it’s been happening since quite some time now. I tried contacting you on your cell phone some days ago, but was met with a stern “She is sleeping,” from your husband. How and why you have been putting up with it all? I often wonder.

Do you know that whatever be the reason behind all the torture, it’s not your fault?  You – a highly qualified career woman quit her job to care for her home, toiling day and night trying to fulfil every duty to the best of her ability, ought to realise that this is not the life you need to settle for. Agreed, that it’s easier said than done, but you need to stand up for yourself, for your rights, for your self-respect.  I am also aware that you are battling this crisis by yourself and that’s why I am writing to you, to assure you that I am here for you. Not just I, but the women of our apartment building offer you our unflinching support in your time of need.

You need not stay mum and endure the abuse. You have to fight back! I can often hear the allegations hurled at you by your husband. And, every time you try to answer back I have heard the way he physically tortures you. Why? Oh, why are you putting up with it? Haven’t you informed about it to your family? Or, at least to your close friends? You need to confide in them about the kind of life you are living.  I am sure they will rush in to help you out of that hellhole.

Are you aware, that if not your family, then the law is always there to help you out? There are also organisations that offer their help, legal aid, counselling, in fact, everything you could possibly need to get out of this situation. All you need to do, is call out, and you will receive the help and the support you so need!

Remember, domestic violence is not just physical, but also emotional, psychological, financial as well as sexual. It is inflicted on you for no fault of yours. So, you have every right to stand up against it. For yourself, for your peace of mind, for the life you deserve to live. There is no point in defending the man in any way, because that is not going to change either him, or the way he treats you. That’s one thing you need to realise  – he is never going to change his ways, whatever you do for him.

So, my dear, speak up against him, against the violence, the terror and save yourself. We are here for you. All you need to do is muster the courage and call out and we will take over from there.  I promise. We all do!

Waiting to hear from you about any decision you make.

Your friend, in your time of need.

*********************

I am participating in the #ALetterToHer Blogathon at Women’s Web in support of  victims of domestic violence. 

A victim of domestic violence herself, author Meena Kandaswamy, has given a detailed account of her abusive marriage. A real life story that is bound to send shivers down your spine, were you to read about the violence she had to endure at the hands of her husband. A real life story, that I am sure will encourage many a victim of domestic violence to take up the cudgels against the tormentors who play havoc with their lives. A real life story I would like to read to know more about the brave woman who took a stand on the abuse she was facing and walked out on her marriage. 


13 Replies to “Fight for your life!”

  1. This is a wonderful initiative. So many women suffer in silence till it is too late. I loved your letter – reassuring and hopeful. Did you read about Neha Rastogi? That tape was chilling.

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  2. Very gripping letter, Shilpa. Well written and full of emotion showing the horrible realities of what an abused woman goes through. The letter format works so well written in second person. It speaks so personally and reaches out to battered women, pleading with them to get out and get help. Well done!

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  3. So very tragic, Shilpa. I know of women personally who will not leave an abusive relationship. Some of them are dependent on their husbands financially. To start over is somehow not an option for them and yet others keep mum for the sake of their children. Tragic, really.

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  4. Thank you, Tulika!
    Yes, I read about the Neha Rastogi case and heard the tapes after you mentioned. They were chilling, indeed! I wonder how women go through such torture for years on end!

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  5. Thank you, Eric (Cathy)!
    How and why do they face all the atrocities, I always wonder! It sends shivers down my spine! They really need to get out and get help, provided they gather some courage to do so! 😦

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  6. Yes, Rachna. And, however much their well-wishers may urge them to leave their abusive marriages, they stay put for so many reasons and lead pathetic lives! My heart goes out to them! 😦

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  7. Yes, Rachna. And, however much their well-wishers may urge them to leave their abusive marriages, they stay put for so many reasons and lead pathetic lives! My heart goes out to them! 😦

    Like

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