“If you want to live a happy Life, tie it to a goal, not to people or objects.”
“Do not put the key to your happiness in another person’s pocket.”
We live our entire lives in pursuit of happiness; seeking it in the people in our life, in materialistic objects that lose their shine in a matter of days. Being by ourselves frightens us and leaves us feeling incomplete.
But, in reality…
Being able to enjoy one’s company, being able to find happiness in activities we do for ourselves, being responsible for our own emotions and happiness, makes us emotionally independent!
It’s what I wanted since years–to not be in a desperate need to have someone around me to feel happy, being comfortable with myself and find happiness in my work.
The craving for a company all the time made me desperate and dejected.
However, I realized that people aren’t constant in our lives. People leave after they have fulfilled their purpose in our life. The ones who do stay, are the very few who we call our “soul mates”. But, even our soul mates might not be around precisely when we need them!
“Everyone leaves. Learn to survive alone.”
…is a quote that made me realize this fact about LIFE.
Friends leave, some stay, some drift away, some find new friends; we grow emotionally distant from our partners, too, after spending years together; our children grow and leave the nest.
Who are we left with, ultimately? Just ourselves!
It is we who will be with us for the rest of our lives. So, why not be our own best friends–develop a strong bond with ourselves, learn to love ourselves and our company so much so, that we are never in need of another person to make us happy!
The best way to do this, as Albert Einstein said, is by having a GOAL in life. A goal that consumes us, our time, our thoughts, our energy, to such an extent, we hardly find the time to rue a person’s absence around us.
The GOAL could be your work, your hobby, volunteering at an NGO for kids, the elderly or an animal shelter, where we give our time to others, which, in turn, brings us immense peace and satisfaction.
Looking after your family’s needs is not your ‘purpose’; it’s your responsibility towards them.
A ‘PURPOSE’ is what will be your responsibility towards YOURSELF, one that will make you truly happy!
If you are wondering what is it that could be your purpose/goal, write things that make you happy–an activity/hobby/work that fulfills your emotional & creative needs, choose the one that’s closest to your heart, and just go for it!
5 BENEFITS OF BEING EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY:
The most important one being you will be comfortable in your own company. Not a dull moment, nor a lonely one!
You won’t have to wonder what to do with your time. You will always have a list of things to do that will keep you happy and occupied.
Being emotionally strong gives you a sense of purpose, and a strength you never knew you had.
It also improves productivity! Considering you give more importance to your work or activities and less of it to people, you can decide your schedule as per your convenience and get more and more work done in lesser time.
Being alone won’t ever scare you or leave you ill at ease. be it staying at home alone, or travelling alone or even watching a film alone, it gives you a sense of liberation and endless peace of mind.
THINGS TO DO WHEN FEELING LONELY:
- Go on a solo date. You will love it!
- Write your feelings in a journal
- Pursue a hobby.
- Learn a new skill that you can add to your CV
- De-clutter and re-organize your wardrobe/kitchen cabinets
- Spend time gardening/crocheting/sewing
- Go for a walk/jog/swim.
- Join a gym/yoga class
- Doodle/solve puzzles
- Visit a theatre/a museum
- Go to your favorite cafe.
- Have a spa day at home
- Call up your friends/sisters/mum
- Spend time with pets
- Scrub your house to a shine (my fave therapy!)
- Prepare a to-do list for the next week/month
- Listen to music and dance along
- Watch a movie at home with some popcorn to set the scene
- Cook your favourite dish/bake
Wish you the best!
I am participating in the April A to Z Blogging Challenge. My theme this year is SELF-CARE.
You can read all my posts here.